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Sex Position of the Week: Choking – The Ultimate Power Play
2 mins
There’s something intoxicating about the idea of surrendering control. The thrill of submission, the raw intensity of dominance it’s why choking remains one of the most alluring and electrifying elements of BDSM play. A firm but careful hand around your throat can send shivers down your spine, heightening pleasure, trust, and intimacy. But, as with all things that blur the line between pleasure and pain, choking must be done correctly, with full consent and safety at the forefront.
So, if you’re curious about how to explore the deliciously naughty world of choking, here’s a sensual, step-by-step guide to doing it safely, confidently, and oh-so-pleasurably.
Step 1: Establish Boundaries & Consent
Before diving into this intense experience, open and honest communication is key. Discuss limits, safewords, and comfort levels with your partner. While some people enjoy a light, dominant grip, others crave more intense restriction. Find out where you both stand and agree on a signal—verbal or physical—to stop immediately if needed. Establishing trust through conversation beforehand makes the experience all the more exhilarating.
Additionally, explore your partner’s past experiences and comfort levels. Some may have had negative encounters with breath play, and it’s important to be mindful of personal history. Setting a foundation of respect and care only makes the thrill of submission and domination even more powerful.
Step 2: Get Into Position
Choking can enhance many positions, but it works especially well in those that emphasize dominance and submission. Straddling, missionary, and doggy style all lend themselves beautifully to the right kind of hand placement. When your partner is on top, they can press their weight into your throat for added intensity. If you’re the one in control, make sure to establish firm but gentle dominance.
Experiment with different positions and angles to find what works best for you and your partner. Some may enjoy being restrained while being choked, while others may prefer the flexibility of moving freely. Adding in elements like eye contact and whispered affirmations can deepen the experience, making it more sensual and emotionally charged.
Step 3: Perfect the Technique
Choking isn’t about cutting off all air—it’s about the right balance of pressure and placement. Aim for the sides of the throat, where the carotid arteries are, rather than pressing directly on the windpipe. A firm but controlled grip with the thumb and fingers around the sides of the neck will enhance that dizzying, euphoric sensation without causing harm. Keep your fingers relaxed at first and gradually apply pressure, monitoring your partner’s reactions at all times.
It's essential to stay attuned to your partner’s non-verbal cues. Signs of discomfort, panic, or distress mean you should stop immediately. Also, never apply continuous pressure for too long—intermittent restriction allows for safe exploration of this practice.
If you’re new to choking, consider practicing on yourself first. Lightly pressing the sides of your own neck can give you an idea of how much pressure is safe and what sensations to expect. Remember, the goal is a pleasurable, erotic experience—not something that causes fear or harm.
Step 4: Play With the Build-Up
Teasing is half the fun. Don’t just go straight for the throat—let the anticipation build. Brush your fingers over the neck, tighten your grip slowly, whisper filthy words in their ear while you apply pressure. The combination of domination and sensory overload will have them begging for more.
Adding sensory play into the mix can elevate the experience further. Try combining light choking with other forms of stimulation—soft touches, biting, or temperature play with ice cubes or warm breath against the skin. This layered approach intensifies pleasure, making every moment more tantalizing.
Another thrilling aspect of build-up is incorporating power dynamics into everyday interactions. Subtle gestures, like placing a hand lightly on your partner’s throat during a makeout session or giving them a playful squeeze in a non-sexual setting, can create anticipation and excitement long before you’re in the bedroom.
Step 5: Release and Reset
Choking should never last longer than a few seconds at a time. Release the pressure in waves, allowing your partner to catch their breath while keeping them in a state of delicious submission. The contrast between the restriction and the rush of oxygen creates an addictive, euphoric high. When you’re finished, check in with your partner, hold them close, and indulge in the afterglow together.
Aftercare is an essential part of any BDSM play, and choking is no exception. Take time to reassure your partner, cuddle, and express gratitude for the experience. Discuss what felt good, what could be improved, and any lingering emotions. Engaging in this kind of reflection strengthens your bond and ensures a positive experience for both of you.
Advanced Choking Techniques & Variations
Once you’ve mastered the basics, there are ways to take choking play to the next level. Here are a few advanced techniques to consider:
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Two-Handed Choke: Using both hands for a firmer grip can heighten the intensity but should be done with extra caution.
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Rear Choke: Choking from behind, such as during doggy style, provides a different sensory experience. Be mindful of your partner’s comfort level.
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Belt or Scarf Choking: For those with experience, using a soft restraint can create an even greater sense of control. However, always use a quick-release method to ensure safety.
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Incorporating Spanking or Hair Pulling: Combining multiple dominance techniques can amplify the pleasure and deepen the experience.
The Final Word: Safe, Sexy, and Sensational
Choking is undeniably hot, but it’s a power move that demands respect, communication, and responsibility. When done correctly, it’s an erotic game of trust, control, and raw passion that leaves both partners breathless—literally. So, if you’re ready to take your pleasure to the next level, grab your partner, take charge, and lose yourself in the pulse-racing thrill of it all.
Stay safe, stay sexy, and keep exploring.
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This blog is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice. Sexual choking carries serious risks, including injury or death. Before trying it, do your own research, communicate clearly, and understand all risks. Seek expert guidance, prioritize consent, and practice risk-aware play. Hunnybee is not responsible for any outcomes from the use of this information. Stay safe